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The Ball is Too Fast, The Game Is Too Slow, The Name Is Too Long Review

By , on October 5, 2010

The Ball is Too Fast, The Game Is Too Slow, The Name Is Too Long
  • Publisher: Level'D
  • Genre: Action
  • Released: 26 Sep, 2010
  • Size: 15.5 MB
  • Price: $1.99
Download on the AppStore
4 out of 5


  • Pong meets Arcanoid meets shuffle-board style gameplay.
  • Fun dialogue exchanges.
  • Unlockable character and 2-player mode.


  • No online content or social features.


TBITF (no I'm not adding the whole title here, it's too long!) has a quirky style that's backed up with solid and simple competitive gameplay mechanics and a 2-player mode to enjoy with friends.

  • Full Review
  • App Store Info

'The Ball is Too Fast, The Game Is Too Slow, The Name Is Too Long'... yes, that's the name of the game. And yes, I'll admit I was caught by its stupidly long name and had to give the game a whirl. So, well played Level'D - your cunning plan is apparently working!

In keeping with the 'Pong' themed week we've seemingly started through you'll pit yourself against AI opponents in a sort-of Pong / Arcanoid style of competitive game where you'll need to break through and score points against your opponent to advance the story. Touching your paddle at the right time will impart added speed to your ball, but should you knock a fast ball back it'll catch on fire, plowing through most bricks and straight to the opponent. As the title suggests, the gameplay can quickly swing between slow periods of breaking to fast periods of high-speed tension, so you'll need to keep your wits about you while playing.

The game's visual and aural style conflict a little, pairing off a fun and interesting set of 8-bit tunes with clean cartoonish visuals that don't quite match up. The actual character art is a bit amateurish, but this is often limited to small portraits when reading the amusing dialogue exchanges between the humans and robots.

A head-to-head 2-player option is also available, along with an unlockable character to use in 1-player mode as well. TBITF may revel in its silliness, but its solid core of gameplay remains untarnished and whether you're playing against a quirky robot or a friend, it's a fun game to whip out now and then.


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